A Moment in God’s Love Light|
A Moment in God’s Love Light
By Connie Wilcox
What if you could spend just a few secaonds in Heaven right now? What
would you expect to happen? Would you find yourself in awe of
Heaven’s wonders, glory, and majesty? Would you seek the face of our
precious Savior or loved ones that have gone on before? Do you
speculate being in the breathtaking presence of the God of all
creation? Does your heart skip a beat just trying to comprehend the
experience? If you answered yes to any or all of my questions, then
let me share with you a very special gift that I was given in the mist
of my troubled years of abuse and despair.
Often we hear of someone who has gone through some harrowing or near
death experience where they find themselves in an astonishing place
called Heaven. As Christians we are promised a home there and joy
everlasting. We set our goal in life to obtain that promise of a
Heavenly inheritance shared with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
Most often we have to wait until we reach the end of our lives to
experience that reward, but not always. The story I’m about to tell
you is absolutely the most awesome moment of my life, for I was given
a little touch of Heaven.
All my life I’ve felt the company of a benevolent entity with me
constantly. You have probably sensed the attendance of the ‘unseen’
as do many others. I’ve never felt totally alone at any time even
before I gave my life up to the Lord. I believe that I have always
had a divine presence in my life, even to this day, praise God. At
times we get so familiar with that presence that we take it for
granted just like the air we breathe. We are distracted in so many
ways we don’t take notice of the obvious.
I told my history of being trapped in an abusive marriage for over six
years in the November issue of Good News Northwest. The trials I went
through were turbulent and yet life changing. Unfortunately we create
for ourselves some really awful situations to live through, but our
Lord has promised to be with us and carry us through, and that is
exactly what HE did.
About three years into my marriage I was aware that my life and future
was in terrible doubt. My husband was totally in control of every
waking moment of my life. The only time I could have time for myself
was to sneak away in the night to the comfort of the Christian Channel
to revive my spirit and help me cope with my everyday world. I never
knew what the next day would hold.
On one of those occasions I was able to sneak out of bed and go into
the living room and turn on the TV where I could listen to a Christian
show of just beautiful worship music. I turned the sound down as low
as I could to not awaken anyone. I just sat back and let the words
and music soothe my aching heart. What I’m about to reveal to you
will not even start to give you the totality of what happened next but
I will try.
In my heart I was singing along and applying the words into my heart
and spirit. I let go of all my troubles and the problems I was facing
and I just fell into a place where I let my ‘inner self’ send my love
to the Lord. As my eyes closed and bowed my head, I started sending
love to Him over and over. I wasn’t thinking of anything, only the
words of the songs, as I remember. I was physically, from my heart,
sending love to the Lord. I remember that I was very humble and
quiet. I was crying softly and totally unaware of any of my concerns
or surroundings. I was just sending out Love to my Savior.
Then it started. With my eyes closed and totally in peace, I felt
like a spiritual shaft of light was going out from my heart in a
straight up into Heaven. The light flowed from my upper body like a
strong solid beam. It was totally awesome to experience, but I was
only in the beginning stages of my moment with God. As I pressed more
and more to send my love, I was taken by surprise by another much
brighter light being sent back into my spirit and my being. The ‘love
light’, as I call it, was not just going out but was being sent back
into me by the Lord Himself. The intensity started to multiply
hundreds over times over what I had started. The inter-change was
pure love. I knew that I was in total union with the Lord and I was
experiencing His eternal and divine love. He was pouring down his
love and I was sending up my love; we were in total harmony. My
love and His love were one in that Holy Light. With my eyes closed I
could see the light and with all my being I embraced His love. It was
so wonderful. I could see sparkles of brighter lights darting around
within the beam. It was beyond words to describe.
I don’t know how long I was able to hold on to His love, but I can
only explain the experience as total ecstasy. I now knew the physical
love of God and the overwhelming joy that comes from His presence. I
was given just moments to realize the awesome reality of His power,
majesty, glory, and love together at the same time.
I knew that God was pouring His love back into me and I wanted to stay
there in that love forever. Then something happened. I told the
Lord, “Lord, please don’t stop.” But that is just what happened!
The light was gone without warning! The abruptness and absence of
that ‘Love Light’ being taken was so shocking that I wasn’t able to
understand why it was over. I opened my eyes and realized that the
front of my clothes was soaked through from my tears, but I hadn’t
made a sound during those precious moments. I asked myself, what had
I just experienced?
I was so stunned that it was over. I felt positive that I had somehow
been the reason for the light’s sudden and unexpected departure. The
mixture of my feelings was almost overpowering. When I finally
regained my senses, I realized that I had been given the most
wonderful gift anyone could be given; the physical Love of Christ.
Words will never even start to explain the ecstasy that filled my
body, soul, and spirit in those few moments. It was a touch of Heaven
and God’s presence.
Those few seconds of time changed my life forever. It gave me the
assurance of Christ’s Love in a way that few ever know. Its memory
gave me the courage to handle all the days of testing that were coming
my way, and continues to be a mighty strength as I live every day
But my story isn’t quite over yet. You remember I said I was so
shocked by the unexpected halt of my ‘Love Light’. Well one day
several years later as I was in conversation with the Lord and I asked
Him, “Lord, why did You leave me so quickly when I had just asked You
to keep Your Love pouring in?” He said, “because you started to think
of yourself and the pleasure you were receiving and not focusing on
the love you were giving ME”. WOW, it hit me like a brick. The
answer was such an eye opening lesson to me. I was thinking of
myself, not the Lord anymore.
God’s Love is so awesome that I just couldn’t stop wanting more and
more of it. I began to experience His Love, and was so overwhelmed. I
just wanted His Love. I became selfish and started to look towards my
own desires, and therefore I cut off my own access to that wonderful
Love. I often refer to it as ‘standing on a spiritual hose’ there-by
cutting off the flow of God’s blessings. I learned the Lord is
always pouring in blessings, but I am not receiving them because I’m
standing on my ‘blessings hose’. Sometimes I find myself looking at
the world and its troubles and I’m self absorbed in my own problems
and forget the source of my blessings. Now is when I ask, “are you
standing on your own blessings hose?” Giving your love to others is
one way to get off of that hose.
I believe the essence of Heaven is just like His Love, constantly
flowing from His presence. I learned a wonderful lesson through all
this. Just like His Word tells us, “we must love one another as we
love ourselves”. If we are to be like Him and be an example to
others, then we must give our love to others no matter who they are.
We are to love and mimic the Lord and His life here on the earth.
Wow, that’s a big order isn’t it? But we don’t have to do it alone.
We have the Lord’s help in all that we do. He is gives our inner man
the strength and courage to do what is right.
We must remember, we have not because we ask not. We must ask for
help with whatever we need to accomplish. As we release our faith and
give Him our troubles and cares, he gives us His strength. The more
we let go and let Him work in us, the easier it is to live our lives
as an example of His life.
Many times we learn from other’s experiences. Maybe my experience
will shine some light into your life. I realize not receiving God’s
blessings is my own fault. I have access but cannot receive the
blessings because I block them with my own selfish thinking. I must
put on the mind of Christ and then I understand. I must be in the
giving mode not the taking mode. When I change how I think, then
doors open and blessings come forth. Whenever I find myself standing
on my hose, letting the world creep in around me, I’m reminded of my
time with the Lord and those precious moments basking in His love, and
I learn to let go and let Him move in my life.
I find great truth in the words in Ephesians 3:14-20.
“…..He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be
strengthened with might by His Spirit in the inner man; that Christ
may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded
in love, may be able to comprehend with all saints what is the
breadth, and length, and the depth, and height; and to know the love
of Christ, which passeth all knowledge, that ye might be filled with
all the fullness of God.”
Love is a wonderful thing to give and receive. During this Holiday
season and all the year, through I encourage you to unlock the door to
your heart, take your foot off your spiritual hose, and let your love
light shine. Let it shine to all those with whom you come into
contact, and let your prayers carry forth your love to those not
within your reach. We wish you all a Merry Christmas and may God
Bless you and yours.