IT''S JUST YOU AND ME
By: Laudia Jones
My journey starts out in a bedroom, on the top bunk bed, at about four
years old. My parents were constantly fighting. My brother and I were
frightened because of the hollering. We were prompted to go to bed.
On one particular night I had a dream that’s still vivid to me this
day. I had a dream that I was standing on a sidewalk in a
neighborhood, and I saw Jesus standing on the other side of the
sidewalk. There was a light beaming down on him. There were
passersby’s on his side of the sidewalk, but nobody else could see him
but me. We were starring at each other. And the message I got was:
It''s just you and me.
About three to four years later we went to church in another town,
which was great, because we didn''t go to church much, but it was nice
when we did. Everyone was worshipping God at that church service. I
know I was young, but I could feel the Holy Spirit in there, because
I''d get hot. I would raise my hands and praise God like my daddy. And
I would go up dancing around the church with the kids. The pastor
started laying hands on us kids who desired to receive Jesus as our
lord and savior. And that''s the first time I went down in the spirit.
I received the Holy Ghost that night. It felt like lightening and
fire running all through me.
I didn''t comprehend how to truly live as a Christian at such a young
age, but I believe God began working in me. For instance, discerning
right from wrong, and preparing me for what was ahead.
My mom was sick at the time and she died when I was nine years old.
My brother was hospitalized at the time, and I was left home alone for
a week. I was nervous and scared but very upset CYS took me away from
my home. I missed my father very much. I shut down for at least two
months - barely eating and not talking. I just stared a lot at the floor.
About six months later I was placed in another home with my brother.
I started to talk some but not much. I was happy to see him. Then, we
ended up staying with my aunt and I opened up. She took us to church
and we had visits with our dad again.
A year laer we started living with our dad again. We lived in a small
apartment that my dad could afford, but things were different. My dad
struggled as a single dad and he held readings (psychic parties). I
guess I saw my dad as an individual for the first time and not just my
“dad,” and so I started experiencing my own individuality as well --
not fully aware of who I was and where I stood in life. So I cut my
hair myself and started having independent thoughts at age 11 1/2
We moved around a lot and I saw my dad become more of this person I
didn''t understand. He was so different from the person who had raised
me when my mom was alive. Who I saw my dad becoming had started to
make me feel rejection because of the path he was taking. And I
started to withdraw into forms of isolation, because of things going
on I didn''t understand. My dad was dressing like women, prostituting,
doing drugs, giving psychic readings and holding parties almost
everyday way into the night.
We started moving around a lot. There were drive-by shootings where
people got hurt, drug dealers, and prostitution going on. My brother
got caught up with young juveniles and did bad things. I was still
saying the Lord’s Prayer every night but not fully understanding I
wasn''t growing as a Christian.
The only example I had was my dad, but the lord kept me in His
discernment in areas he wanted. He preserved me for that very
difficult time in my life. The only two things I took from my dad''s
example was individuality, and growing into a feminine young lady.
My dad was in and out of jail. I realized that even though I was
losing my way as an infant in Christ, God was still using me.
My cousin started taking my brother and I to church every Sunday …
from our pit of sin at home. I began reading my Bible more and I would
pray everyday for God to get me out of that bad environment. And I
prayed for my family everyday because we all could have died (My
brother who was hanging out with juveniles, and my dad, who could have
died in his sin).
I believe my life was dedicated to Jesus young and for a purpose - for
a reason. Romans 9:15 says:
For he saith to Moses, I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy,
and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion (KJV).
I believe because of my prayers and reminding my dad about Jesus’ love
for us, my family is still alive today. From there on I began growing
from an infant spiritually into a spiritually maturing young women who
was learning from her mistakes as I grew, and to began to walk right
with the lord.
For there is no difference between the Jew and the Greek: for the same
Lord over all is rich unto all that call upon him. For whosoever
shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. (KJV)
For God hath concluded them all in unbelief, that he might have mercy
upon all. (KJV)
I''m giving glory to Jesus for my ability to write this! AMEN!